Botox, Boots and BMW’s–A Bible Study?

I knew I was about to have some fun when THESE kept us from getting the Bible Study started on time–

I’ll admit, I completely understand even though I was the OLDEST in the room….by a decade! Even I was ooohhhing and awwwing over these heels–

Last night was the first night of a Bible Study I am leading that is filled from the tip of the cute hairdo’s to the tip of the Spring Green toenails with “Twirty Somethings”.

I am thrilled to say the least, to be leading a group of Millennial women though a discussion about THEIR Biblical worldview concerning men, marriage, motherhood AND TATTOOS, for a fun edgy book I have been working on for over 2 years!

The room was filled to the brim as we nervously mingled. They had come at the invitation of my precious hostess, a beautiful young worship leader–aka:Wife, Mom, Daughter, God Chasing Chick.

They came because they love her and they came because they were curious about actually TALKING about the stuff we are going to talk about IN A CHURCH GROUP, A BIBLE STUDY no less!

I have to admit, I speak before large crowds about such tender topics as immorality and abortion–although my rule of thumb is “Never let em see you Sweat”– I was SWEATING!

When I looked out on those gorgeous, curios faces, who ranged from the age of my youngest daughter to my oldest son, gathered in the circle (AFTER I FINALLY DRAGGED THEM AWAY FROM THE RED BOOTS!) all I could think of was “Oh, MY, I should have taken the time to force a few of my OLD girlfriends to come with me”.

I may need some HELP here 🙂

They all sweetly looked at me with respect, anticipation and a bit of hmmmm???…….

I wondered what in the name of MY JESUS, I had gotten myself into.

It turned out, there was no need to worry.

After my brief introduction of the goal of the book; the study I have done to stir my passion and the plan of action for the next 8 weeks, I turned it over to them, which is my main plan for every week. Let THEM do the talking!

WOW—Here we go.

I am in LOVE.

They are fresh, they are honest (in a BIBLE STUDY no less–go figure) and they are ready to talk.

We went around the circle as each told her age, a little about herself and shared their excitement for the study.

One of the first comments was “I want you to know, I sometimes dress like a prostitute for my husband”.

Okey Dokey.

I guess I won’t have to worry about getting to the tough stuff!!

God has me, at my age, involved in some of the most exciting ministry opportunities I have ever experienced, but THIS—THIS is about to rock my world.

Is “rock” a current word girls??? I know your on here 🙂

I am going to be sharing some tid bits from our Tuesday night meetings on Wednesday mornings here on “Living Free”. Some of my sweet young friends will be joining us here to chime in and say hello.

I’ll be giving away LOTS of goodies at the end of the month to my most frequent commenters so PLEASE—

Share your thoughts as we go.

If You would like to be a VIRTUAL part of the group and have TWENTY or THIRTY in your age…leave a comment with your email contact.

I might even take on a few of you “Older” girls for support!! Just let me know if you think you can handle it!

Our First Question–

As women, should we “DRESS for our husbands” in PUBLIC??? or PRIVATE ONLY????

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  1. Wow!! What a great question to start off:)

    Dress for you husband both PRIVATELY and PUBLICLY! Of course, your end product may look a little different (maybe not for the owner of the red boots:) but its no less fun!

    There’s such a great pay off when you can shock your man as you emerge from “hair and makeup” for your night out…especially when you’re going to be around a lot of other people and you know he won’t be able to take his eyes off of you.

    “Cleave” it up every now and then ladies!! Embrace what your mama (or physician) gave ya!

  2. I can’t believe my prostitute comment made it on your blog! haha!
    As for the first question about dressing publicly or privately, I agree with Jan to do both! Although for my hubby, there is nothing hotter than when I dress super-modestly only to be going commando underneath it all! Forget pantylines!!!
    Oops, I’m suddenly wanting to delete my comment…have I said too much?? The mask is off! 🙂

  3. Oh Pat,

    What incredible fun! I love the title of this post soooo much.

    Dress for our husbands in public and in private, but do it differently in both. In public we dress to show him respect and to not cause other men to fall. In private, we can dress to entice our husbands. I’ll admit, I need to do a better job of the ‘in private’ dressing part.

    My man has worked with me on the in public part for years, as is evidenced by an example I gave in my Legacy Bible study of how the way I was dressed ruined a vacation for us. He knew things that I did not recognize.

    Great post.


  4. Great points Leah. As usual, your insight and wisdom leads to some great thoughts.
    I am so blessed to have you speak into these young women from “AFAR”.
    Stay with us!!

  5. So sorry I missed it! It sounded like it was a BLAST!!!! Can’t wait to hear more about it… I’m with the girls, especially Leah on dressing for your man…

  6. Pat, this sounds like a fun Bible study:) Anything with you is superb though!!
    I am 29 and my hubs is 39. We have been married a year and half. I feel like I respect him by dressing conservatively in public. Privately, is definitely different. With that said, I feel like my hubs likes to see me feel confident and pretty in what I am wearing, but I don’t want other men looking at me in a lustful way. I feel like he would be embarrassed for me if I dressed like a hoochie mama, even though he may like that privately;) One thing I like to check before I pick something out of my closet is the motive of my heart for putting that outfit on my body. That’s my biggest thing is always do an honest heart check. Just my humble opinion:)

  7. Thank you Lyndsey,
    You are sweet :). I especially like some of your words: respect; confidence; provoking lust; motive; heart check.
    Great, great guidelines!!
    Thank you so much for joining us!!

  8. Pat,
    I am both humbled and inspired by the group last night. To look around and see these incredible women gathering to ultimately draw closer to God was refreshing.. To sit back and hear the different missions that God has placed on each woman’s heart was incredible. I will share that as I was driving (45 min) to get there.. I was overcome with an incredible sense of insecurity.. I am thankful for the long drive as I talked it out with God and allowed Him to gently remind me that my only true “security” is in Him… I was refreshed that I could feel the “realness” when I entered the room.. I am certain that there are things that I currently think are “truth” are not actual “truth” in comparison to God’s Word. I am excited to be challenged to think outside my box and at the same time get God out of the box I have inadvertently placed Him in…

    As for your post about dressing for your husband publically verses privately…. I agree with Leah. Yet at the same time I also desire to be as bold as Libby privately 🙂 Thanks Libby for having your “mask off”!!

  9. I can’t say enough how humbled and honored I am to be among this group of “chosen” women. What a blessing this group will be in so many ways that some have already enumerated, and some that none of us can see coming. I can’t wait for this ride – it’s going to be a good one!

    My answer for the “dressing for your husband” question is that he is always , ok, SHOULD always be my first consideration in how I dress. Being that my husband and I have firm convictions to “Be holy, as He is holy,” keeping my clothing choices in check is important to both of us. I want to honor God with my appearance, look cute, be comfortable, but not make my husband uncomfortable by wearing something that might draw unwanted attention from other men, and make them stumble. Sometimes I am comfortable in a pair of jeans he might find on the tight side. If he says something about it, I have to really fight sometimes to admit that he may be right and change. But sometimes, it’s easy and I know he’s right – I may have already thought “hmm…” and he just confirms it.
    And privately, of course, his preference is what wins, and thankfully he is a man of simple tastes. 🙂

  10. Hi Pat,

    My wonderful friend Annie (you know her as Ann) sent me over here and I would love to take virtual part in this group! I appreciate your goal and heart for my age group (I’m 31, my wonderful husband is 33 and we’ve been married for 5 years and have 2 boys (Levi-22 months and Seth-5 months.).

    In response to your question, I absolutely agree with the others that dressing for my husband is both in public venues as well as private! Having him tell me years ago of the struggle men have with keeping their eyes pure, I have always strived to ensure that what I wear in public will not cause someone to stumble. In private, that’s different. I know there are certain tops of mine Matt likes more than others that I don’t wear without layering something under and that doesn’t include *ahem* more intimate apparel. I often think, too, about the passage in Ephesians (I believe–I don’t have my Bible handy) where we are reminded that if married, our bodies are not simply our own to do what we want with. I think that could include how we dress.

    Great question.


  11. I think that we should “dress for our husbands” both in public and in private. It is obvious that we would be dressing differently in private than we would in public. However, I see nothing wrong with a sexy “little black dress” every now and then for a night out with the husband. I enjoy the look of pride that he gets in his eye when he sees me walk out in a hot little number ready for a party or a special date night. That look makes me feel loved and appreciated, and after a day of being soaked in “little people” tears (and other “small person” bodily fluids), it makes me feel attractive again! The beauty of dressing sexy is that it can be done tactfully! I enjoyed meeting you all last night. Thanks for including me.

  12. I’m over-the-top excited (and a tad bit jealous) that you are having these discussions face-to-face with this generation of women! HOW AWESOME.

    I love the honesty of the sentiments shared here. I’m in the camp that everything we do with regard to our bodies should be both God-honoring and husband-honoring, not the least of which is how we dress. Even when our guys aren’t around, our look should be respectful of our position as their wives. Once, however, I wore a low-cut dress out for a special dinner with my man, thinking that he would be so thrilled that I “sexed it up” a bit just for him. On the one hand, he did like it, but on the other hand, so did many of the other men that were in the restaurant! He kept catching people looking at my chest, and it made me so self-conscious that I kept tugging and trying to pull it closed! After that, we both decided that dressing that provocatively in public was not for me; I love the ideas mentioned here about dressing form-fitting, but modestly, on the outside, while sharing whatever “secrets” you’re wearing (or not!) underneath! Then it truly is only for him! 🙂

    One of the sexiest things in the world is the confidence that a woman who loves and cares for herself exudes, whether in public or private. There is an air about her that makes others sit up and take notice, and her husband fall in love with her all over again. It’s so easy for us, in this wacko world we live in, to pour everything out until the vessel of our souls is dried out, cracked and empty. Trust me, I KNOW what I’m talking about! Only when we do the work to let the Potter fix the cracks, restore us and fill us back up can we wear that ultra sexy, confident vibe with style. In fact, I’m having a little “work done” right now! 😉

    Keep talking, and I look forward to popping in from time to time in the chat!

    xo m

  13. I won’t be as eloquent as the ladies above…but I love this question and wanted to chime in! Well, I’ve been known to wear tight jeans…and I just about only wear t-back panties! NO panty lines for me. My husband loves me in sexy, fitted clothes–not sleazy– but fitted with a bit of cleavage. I will admit, sometimes I am not comfortable because I feel like if HE thinks it’s sexy–do other men? And THAT I am NOT comfortable with. For one, because I don’t want to cause another to lust…and secondly because I am a daughter of God and want to be modest (yet cute) and not frumpy. So I do “dress” for my husband in public and MOST DEFINITELY in private…but I do try to keep my public dress within reason. I still wear my tight jeans–you’ll see them next Tuesday night probably–but I have given up wearing other things that I felt were crossing a line and might cause unwanted attention by others.

  14. Im am telling you ladies, this conversation makes my heart go pitter-patter.

    I do wonder if I should label Wednesday as “For Girls Only”. I am pretty sure, however, that would probably do more harm than good.

    There is a message rolling around here that I think is worth chewing on and that is..WHAT IS “SEXY”? and WHAT is the REAL goal for pursuing it??

    Is it approval from our husbands? Is it a NEED to feel good about ourselves? Is it a never ending quest for affection?

    I love Melinda’s wise words ”
    One of the sexiest things in the world is the confidence that a woman who loves and cares for herself exudes, whether in public or private. There is an air about her that makes others sit up and take notice, and her husband fall in love with her all over again. It’s so easy for us, in this wacko world we live in, to pour everything out until the vessel of our souls is dried out, cracked and empty. Trust me, I KNOW what I’m talking about! Only when we do the work to let the Potter fix the cracks, restore us and fill us back up can we wear that ultra sexy, confident vibe with style. In fact, I’m having a little “work done” right now!

    What IF, this were true? How would it change YOUR world? How would it change OUR world?
    I’m just sayin’.

  15. This is a great question! 🙂

    And I think that dressing for your husband publically is pretty subjective. It all depends on what your husband prefers. It literally stresses my husband out if my breasts are even a bit exposed. If I’m wearing a revealing top we can’t make it through dinner peacefully without him panicing over someone seeing some side boob. This is probably why God gave me smaller boobs…. So the likelihood of them falling out is slim and so he doesn’t have a heart attack before 30. However, I still do own and occasionally wear tops that are more revealing then he prefers. So, I’m not the perfect wife yet. 🙂 As far as dressing for him privately… I’m with Libby on this topic. My husband and I were out to dinner one night and I was wearing a nice black dress that ended a little bit above my knees. He thought I was wearing a regular pair of black panty hose underneath, but during dinner I lifted my dress enough to reveal that I was wearing a sexy pair of black, lacey, thigh-high stockings. A large smile ran across his face and he said, “check please!” I strongly believe that NO man will balk at the idea of his wife being a little crazy in the bedroom. Your body is his, so put some heels and red lipstick on it and have some fun. It will change your marriage. 🙂

    I hope my mother in law doesn’t read this. It could make for awkward family dinner.

  16. Ashley,
    You crack me up 🙂 plus, I have to admit, made me blush. After all, I have known that “man” since he was a “boy”.
    I have changed my prayers from “help them share Lord” to “Oh my Jesus, HELP ME!!” 🙂

  17. Hi there! I was not able to make this past tuesday and am reading these post and love the realness of the group. I am 32 and have been married to the love of my life for 10 yrs. I am excited to be able to come next tuesday thanks Kalisha for the invite. “Proverbs 7:10” I love to style and to dress to impress my husband “make his head turn” but have always been conscious not to be a stumbling block to others. I definately think respect is huge in how we should dress for our husband in public, but in private for us anything goes. I have been with my husband since highschool so he helped me understand that certain clothing can be a “turn on” if you know what I am saying. I am 5’9 so my skirts and shorts back in the day could be considered “hoochie mama”. I wont even explain my bathing suits in highschool LOL. I was innocent but had no idea how boy’s/men struggle with lust. And anybody that knows me knows I love several cute bikinis and have some stylish short skirts and shorts but, always keep in mind is it appropriate and respectful in public? And “Oh My” only wear full bottom panties if Aunt Flow is visiting ” forget pantylines” and love the comfort of my husbands briefs at night:) I can’t wait to see what God is going to do with all of us and am so excited to meet all of you next tuesday.

  18. I honestly have never thought to ask this question since becoming a wife (13 years ago). But now that I AM thinking about it, I’m beginning to realize that I haven’t dressed specifically for my husband in a long time. The last time I did was when we were dating. I remember one time specifically – our first date! That night was awkward (but obviously not a deal breaker)!

    I still didn’t feel secure about how he would respond to the REAL me and I felt like everything was riding on my image. I was hoping, with every item I put on, that he would accept what I was offering to him.

    I’ve found in our marriage that what my husband appreciates the most is what I’m willing to reveal to him in the safety of our private moments, rather than what I put on for him in public.

    I love Romans 14:22 “Blessed is the one who DOES NOT CONDEMN HIMSELF by what he approves.” May God’s peace go with you no matter what outfit you have on!

  19. Mary, Mary, Mary….
    You, my darling young friend, have discovered one of the the joys of FREEDOM!!
    I am so thrilled to be living/loving/learning TOGETHER with you AGAIN!

  20. Oh my goodness I am loving this conversation!!! Thanks for letting us be a virtual part of your twirty-something girl talk. Love the red boots and the honesty here. I think the most important thing is to ask our husband how he wants us to dress – privately and publicly – and then add a little element of surprise and mystery to his preferences. I have also surprised my man by telling him what is (or isn’t) under that dress I’m wearing while sitting in a quiet corner of a romantic restaurant. He still remembers and comments about THAT night –years later. Smiles and blushing cheeks – Renee

  21. AMEN Ashley!!

    I think we tap into a very small percentage of our ability drive our husbands crazy and it is SO MUCH FUN:)

    SO, the question about what is “sexy” is an interesting one…especially for those of us who are sporting a larger rack because it seems that unless I want to wear a burlap sack EVERYTHING I choose to wear is “sexy” or at best “voluptuous”:)

    I’m all for dressing so as not to attract much unwanted attention but there are a lot of men that will look me up and down no matter what and if they do, my guess is they’ve got bigger issues than what I’m wearing and its out of my hands.

    Also, as important as it is to care about my husbands preferences I think it is equally important to dress for myself. I’ve got to have enough love for my own body and preferences to allow my personality to drive my “wardrobe” bus!! With that comes confidence and with confidence comes “sexy” no matter who you’re married to:)

  22. Well, I wish I would’ve been the one to say it, but I agree with what I’ve seen some of the other ladies posting. We should dress for our husbands on both types of occassions, but the type of dress should be different. We can dress up to go out, put on make-up and style our hair. I think we should keep in mind HOW we are dressing for these occassions. I think there is always that appeal to try to look sexy for our men, but we should keep in mind that our husbands are not the only men who are going to be seeing us on these occassions. I would hate to be the woman distracting someone else’s husband. I wouldn’t want her to be distracting mine! There is something to be said for modesty. You can be sexy without letting the skin pour out.

  23. I’m so glad to see some of my friends commenting on here, in addition to the group girls. This is great and the points everyone have made (is that even gramatically correct?) are so good! This was a before-bed conversation topic with my husband last night and I was glad that he agreed with my answer, but he also wanted to know if women really know how big this is of an issue for men. The vast majority of men, Christian or not, have not made a “covenant with their eyes” (Job 31:1) and with the prevalence of skin (among other things) in the world, on TV, in movies, etc, they don’t see what is wrong with catching a few glances when the opportunites arise, which unfortunately is very often. Plus, the world tells them that it’s ok, and if we want to dress a certain way, that’s their problem if they are looking. What a contradiction that is! I feel like it’s my sin if I dress in a way that perpetuates either side of that, so as I said before, I try to take that into consideration when I am getting dressed.

  24. I love it!!! I am 29 years old and have been married for 9 years to my high school sweetheart! I totally play it up in the privacy of our bedroom for him, but in public I am way more modest! I try to be strong, conservative, and yet sexy sofisticated in public. Nice form fitting pair of skinny jeans with a killer pair of boots are great as long as the top is looser fitting to cover right below the butt and minimal clevage! I am all about the accessories! My husband loves to buy me shoes and fun jewelery, he knows how much I love them and feel good about myself while wearing them! One time we were going into a charity dinner, I was wearing a long black dress with spagetti straps. My husband and I parked the car, I took a glance around me to make sure no one was looking and slipped off my lacy black thong and handed it to him. His eyes got so big, he then stuck them in his suit pocket and we had a great night. When we were ready to leave, I kissed him on the cheek and said “ready?” His hand slid over his suit pocket and he said “READY!” Soooo Much Fun!!! I think the most important thing is being respectful to ourselves, our man, and most important our Creator. I will admit before we had 2 beautiful daughters, I probably pushed the limits more, but now I am not only thinking about being a stumbling block for other men, It is more about being an example to my girls that you can dress beautiful, fun, sexy and still exude a sence of pride, and class! Im soooo excited about this blog! I am so excited about this study! I can’t wait to see what other topics come up!!!

  25. Pat, me too 🙂

    Jan, you are spot on! There will be men who will look at other women no matter what they are wearing – and that is out of our control!

  26. Good stuff! I thought about making a funny comment but since this is my mother-in-law’s blog and my husband occasionally reads it – I will refrain! 🙂
    Just needed to write something so G knows I’m reading 🙂

  27. Bethany,
    You little cutie! We need you in our group…and guess what, YOU are just the right age 🙂
    As for the TMI about my son…..mmmm…..maybe 🙂
    Thank you for chiming in!

    Thanks to all of you for your enthusiasm and your hearts!! My anticipation for what God has in mind is off the charts,

  28. Thank you so much for allowing us all to come on this journey. Although I also arrived at the meeting Tuesday night fighting insecurity, I left with such a sense of expectation for what the coming weeks will hold. I am looking forward to discovering what authenticity looks like among sisters in Christ who take off their masks and allow themselves to be vulnerable, and I’m asking God for the courage to go there.

    Ok, so as for the ‘question of the week’, I know it’s taken me a little longer to respond, but that’s because this question provoked a lot of self-reflection for me. The truth is that all women, including me, want to be ‘seen’ as beautiful and desireable. And Christian women are no exception to the rule. But what the world tells me that looks like (in every medium possible) and what God tells me that looks like (in His word) are two completely different things, and that’s why it’s crucial that I guard my heart and my mind. It all comes back to the motives of the heart.

    As for me personally, I have always wanted to look good for my man ALL THE TIME, but I know I look my best when I am confident in who I am because that exudes regardless of what I’m wearing.

  29. Tami,
    We are so glad you braved the step out to join us. I know what you are saying, especially in your position. Let’s give this all we have, beginning with our prayers. We need one another for support, accountability and success as women who truly honor God in word, deed and action.
    Thank you for your beautiful words.

  30. Ladies,
    I just want to say how much I admire your honesty and your vulnerability. This is SURELY NOT the generation I was born of.
    When I was 23, I was turning to abortion to hide my fear and failure. Little did I know how dark that darkness can get.
    Honestly, I think the tide has turned. Your daughters will know better.
    Praise His Holy Name!!
    I am working on this weeks assignment and will have it to you over the weekend.
    More importantly, I am praying for everyone of you.

  31. Oh and just for the record, I’m also a tight jeans kinda girl 🙂 and after 16 years of marriage there is nothing I love more than to catch my husband checking me out!

  32. Yes, it’s me again…. just can’t stay away! I just wanted to say I wish there was a “like” button for the comments on here. (Am I addicted to FB?) I just love what everyone is saying and love that through all our comments, the common thread is love for our God and wanting to honor Him, and love for our husbands. I’m sure we’re not all at the same place in our marriage where we still (or ever?) feel that desire to please him, and maybe not in our relationships with the Lord, but I have found that when I am with women who “have it” (not all together, but are pursuing it and I can see it), it makes me want more of it. Does that make any sense? I hope it does. I was at a place in my marriage where honoring God and certainly honoring my husband were not on my list – at all – but by allowing God to bring godly women into my circle who modeled a passion for Christ and oneness with their husbands – even if I didn’t buy into it right away – He used it to change me and now I want to be that example for other women, and continue to be refined by them!

    OK, so I said way more than about this topic, but I think it’s relevant. And as I think about all the women in our group, and who may read this, I just want to encourage them that we didn’t all just get here, God got us here, but it was an effort for us both. 🙂 <3

  33. Pat, I know that I am a couple years past the 30’s….and not married, but just wanted to share a thought. When I was younger and dealing with my past in a “worldly manner”, I thought that dressing to “please” a man was the way to go. I wanted to turn heads, and it didnt matter if they were single or not…just being honest…

    There came I time, standing in front of a mirror all dressed and ready to go out, that I just cried. I looked like the girl my grandmother NEVER wanted me to be…I had little respect for myself, for the people I was going out with, or the men that would cross our path that night. My thoughts went to a conversation that I had with my precious g-ma when I first started dating. She told me that I needed to ALWAYS remember that first and formost, I was a child of God. And that my every action should reflect that. She told me that I needed to dress to be respectful of God. Needless to say….I stayed home that night, in my pj’s covered in the Word of God and sweet memories of my g-ma.

    So I have held onto that. Now, that is not to say that I dont believe that “dressing” for you husband in private is a bad thing 😉 I think that in private, it is a whole new ball game.

  34. Sweet Terry,
    I have missed your blog visits 🙂
    The thing i love MOST about your comment here is the “G-Ma” quote!
    Being a GMa myself, it blesses me to know that my Grands will plant the things I say into their hearts and become the kind of women (and Men) that have character and grace like YOU!!
    My love sweet lady.

  35. Precious Pat – Yes, the comments, actions and love that you provide as a G-Ma go far. I can say that a BIG part of who I am today is because of the unconditional love that my sweet G-Ma showed me. I have also missed visiting your blog…just have had ALOT going on. Not ready to blog or FB about it, but lots of doctors and decision making going on. Would be very thankful for prayer.

  36. hi Pat!
    Not sure HOW I missed this post till now. I’m barely squeaking in on the 30-something crowd as I roar toward 39 this summer. How did THAT happen?!?
    Am so excited to see what God is up to with you and your new study- BECAUSE – all this year as I have prayed for you and your ministry, the title of your last study “surrendering the secret” has haunted me. Not haunted in a bad way – more of come to me over and over.
    I’m in a not-so-usual group of my generation in that I got married when I was 19 and my sweet husband is the only man I’ve ever been with, so abortion did not come across my “radar” till I had my little boy with Down Syndrome and I heard the termination stats that the diagnosis brings (over 92%).
    BUT, even more than that, I keep thinking and knowing that all women carry secrets – be them insecurity secrets, marriage secrets, financial secrets and the list goes on and on. And, as I have prayed for you, I’ve thought, “Pat needs to expand her thought of “secret” to include more areas than just abortion.” Any sin that separates us from freedom in Christ needs to be surrendered to grace.
    So, while I do not know what your new study is about or up to – I’m confident that God has you on the right track!
    As for dressing for my man, he claims that he loves me make-up free in a pony-tail and ball cap as much as – if not more than – all dressed up. I tend to think that women dress for the approval for other women – not for the approval of their husbands. Mine seems to be quite content with a set of shaved legs and a loving heart as opposed to a sexy pair of jeans and cleavage (although he would appreciate the effort 🙂
    So now I’m going to have to go read your older blog posts to see what the whole story is!
    I’ve got some fun purses that I could donate/drop off to you as well from my business that you can give as door prizes too.
    Have a blessed week!
    Love, Molly

  37. well, as much as I would love to meet you ladies face-to-face, and be a part of your vibrant, controversial, “real” discussion face-to-face, I will settle for virtual discussion.
    I am 30 (still trying to come to grips with that), been married just over 10 years, with four great children (ages 7,6,4.5,3.5)
    Molly, I totally agree with this comment from you “As for dressing for my man, he claims that he loves me make-up free in a pony-tail and ball cap as much as – if not more than – all dressed up. I tend to think that women dress for the approval for other women – not for the approval of their husbands. Mine seems to be quite content with a set of shaved legs and a loving heart as opposed to a sexy pair of jeans and cleavage (although he would appreciate the effort” —
    yes, my husband thinks natural is more “sexy”. yet, I do find myself dressing for “other women” . . . I dress differently at the annual women’s retreat than my usual jeans/ jean shorts and simple shirts. It’s interesting to hear someone else verbalize that those same sentiments.

    interesting discussion ladies . . .
    = )

  38. I’ve just read through all the comments, and I’m excited to know that these young women want to be involved in Bible study. I’ve loved reading their comments! I’d love to visit your Bible study, but I live too far away, and I’ll be 66 tomorrow, so way past the age–ha, and have been married for 45 years. Ladies, just want to share something because I’m praying/encouraging a friend who needs her husband’s attention & love.

    Some of us get so involved with our kids, our jobs, taking care of our homes–we almost forget about our husbands and their needs to be loved, needed, appreciated, seen as our confidants, our lovers. I was guilty of that for too many years. After my parents separated for a year, which was devastating to me as their only child, my husband said to me, “If we don’t start taking time for each other, when the kids are gone, we could end up just like your parents.” He was absolutely right! So, for awhile, I worked at keeping our relationship at #2 after our love for God.

    As we’ve gotten older and life has brought heartache and reality of aging into our lives, I’ve once again been busy care giving for my parents until their death, helping our daughter through health and financial struggles, but not caring enough for my husband’s needs.

    So please, don’t do as I did. You all sound like you’re doing a great job now of letting your husbands know how much you love them and need them. Don’t ever stop that! You all have helped me realize I need to take more care of how I dress in public and in private for my lover. I wear jeans to work and at home, and even to church once in awhile. I need to be more intentional about how I dress publicly, so he’ll be proud to sit by me. In private, I need to throw away shorts & T-shirts, and buy some new nighties.

    Girls, you probably think you will never get to be like me, and I HOPE & PRAY that is true! Just wanted to share from a very different perspective…

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